“Woman, Where’s My Supersuit?”:The Black Hero’s costume problem

Most of the old school Black superheroes came about in the 1970s. While certain individual creators may have had good intentions for these characters, I maintain this wave of black heroes was not a noble attempt by the The Big Two to be diverse and provide ‘positive images’ to black youth:

These 70s black superheroes (among the first) and Kung Fu heroes like Shang Chi and Karate Kid were only created to try to cash in on the blaxploitation and Kung Fu movies that were so popular at the time.

The proof is in the costumes: Luke Cage and Falcon, Black Lightning– even the Superfriends’ generic Black Vulcan– wore chest baring V-Necks and 70s collar outfits with black power fros that owed much to disco, TV and Movie stereotypes of pimps and the garish getups of the funk bands of the time, like Earth Wind and Fire and Parliament Funkadelic.

I was personally scarred as a child when I saw that Black Lightning’s ‘afro’ was a wig that was connected to his mask. Does Nightwing’s hair come off with his mask, too?…NO, it does not! Might I add: the “one-piece” worn by The Legion of Superheroes’ Tyroc and Black Goliath’s mid-riff baring outfit weren’t the most masculine things in the world.

The problem with these tacky, fad inspired threads were that they instantly dated characters who otherwise would’ve been ‘legends’ for simply being the first decent black supeheroes.

This is what happened to Black Lightning and Cage…When they were brought back in the 90s, their styles were ‘updated’ to more current ‘fads’. And what about today? Do you think Cage’s doo rag and gold chain look says “superhero”? When the publisher constantly changes a character’s look, it becomes a fad to the reader (and the writer), and the character is soon discarded…again. Captain America, Spider Man, Super Man and Batman still wear a version of same outfit they started out with (w/minor alterations). We recognize them.

When the 80s came along, the ‘fad’ of the blaxploitation superhero stopped… As Blacks tried to move into corporate America, black superheroes pushed their way into established franchises like Iron Man and the Green Lanterns. They moved away from the ‘superfly’ look and wore the uniforms provided by their ‘bosses’ at Stark Industires and the GL Corps. Black superheroes still weren’t distinctive characters.

The nineties gave us ‘unknown’ black superheroes. Most readers didn’t know these guys were black because they were hideously deformed zombies or wore masks–over hideously deformed faces…DeathLok, Spawn (and isn’t Deadpool a brother too?) fit this category…Xero wore a ‘Mission Impossible’ mask that made him look like a white man. I won’t even get started on Rage and Night Thrasher.

I’ll end this on a positive note with:

A list of Black Superheroes with respectable gear:

Brother Man (the name sucks, though)
Black Panther
Rocket (Icon)
Bumblebee (Teen Titans)

Fitty Cents Pile:

Spider Man: House of M #1, #2 and #4
Peter Parker is a superstar among mutants in the House of M world. But unbeknownst to the world at large, he is not a mutant. Can he keep his secret, or will his bitter assistant J. Jonah Jameson and The Green Goblin destroy Spider Man’s life? Salvador Larroca’s pencils and Liquid!’s colors are great. The story by Mark Waid is entertaining, But I don’t like Peter Parker so much in this story. I just wanted this for #1′s cover. I bought the other two, so I could work on completing this set. 3 Stars

Amazing Spider Man #501
There was a JMS Spidey story that had me riveted a few years ago. Peter had recently told May he was Spider Man. She was angry with him, giving him the silent treatment. This whole issue was her fuming, avoiding Peter. She thinks about him, but goes about her day, and along the way sees some story about a heroic deed Spidey performed, or something like that. At the end, she goes the library and googles Spider Man. That was issue # four hundred and ninety something. I never read the follow up issues, but always wanted to read the issue where they have it out.

Then Derek listed #501 as one of his favorites. When I heard the title; “Saturday in the Park with May”, I thought it this was the story I was looking for these past couple of years. I finally found it and read it.

It’s not the story I thought it was. No heart-wrenching dialogue between the Parkers. It’s just a regular run-of-the-mill, day-in-the-life-of-a-superhero story. Been done before. And better. Spider man fights a D-List villian while May narrates and does the character development thing. Whatever. After I read this issue, Derek reassessed this story as “nothin’ special” on CBN #50, I think.
3 Stars (mostly for the J.R. Junior art.)

There were a bunch of trades were in the quarter bin, but only two were of interest to me (they charged me a dollar each):

The acquired taste of Rick Vietch’s Crypto Zoo, A TPB of his “Rare Bit Fiends” comics. RBF is an illustrated collection of the artist’s dreams. There are some gems in here. A lot of gems. If you like Vietch’s work (Brat Pack, GreyShirt), or you like personal comic stories, (i.e. real art…like Spawn #10, or that Animal Man story with Wile E. Coyote) then you’ll like this. I like the appendix in the back that explains Vietch’s interpretation of his dreams. 3.5 Stars

Joe R. Lansdale’s Drive In
I would have passed over this one had I not re-read some of Mike M’s weekly reads the night before. He gave the first issue of this a good review:

It’s a night out at the Drive-In for hundreds of people. A comet crashes right near the place, a dome surrounds it and traps the people inside. If you put Stephen Kings “The Mist” in a mixing bowl, set in a Drive In Theater instead of a supermarket and add a pinch of tired dialogue, lots of gore and violence then stir….you have this story.

The book purports to love the grindhouse movies of the 70s, yet virtually nothing is said of them…It’s just a backdrop. Also I felt many of the characters where 1-Dimensional stereotypes. That’s okay in a purely action story, but there is plenty of opportunity to do more with the characters here. The Christians are made into dumb stereotypes just because the writer doesn’t like religion. When a writer makes HIS characters one dimensional idiots just because he doesn’t like that character or their lifestyle, then he is cheating the audience and himself*. It’s lazy. Maybe the 1988 novel is better than this comic book adaption.

Andres Guinaldo’s artwork is very detailed and would be more of a pleasure if it were either in color or at least done in a grayscale (Is that the term I’m looking for?) It’s so finely detailed, with thin black inks against stark white pages with no variation, it could give you a headache looking at it…
2.5 Stars

* The “one dimensional idiot” rule is suspended if the character is a cold hearted killer, a child molester or a right wing pundit.

In CBN #52, Derek Coward challenged my statement that Len Wien deserves a large percentage from the use of the Wolverine character. He also disagreed with my assertion that what Wolverine is today sprung totally from the character Wein put into place in Hulk 180 and 181.

Wolverine is wholly Len Wein’s creation, as much as Spider Man is Stan Lee’s creation.

Let’s look at the important “upgrades” to Wolverine, made by other writers and artists since Hulk 180-181. These are the traits that Wein supposedly had nothing to do with, but I’ll make the argument that these changes could only have come from the foundation the Len Wein put into place..

Here are the major Wolverine traits:

Logan’s Look
He’s a Mutant
Healing Factor
adamantium bones
claws housed in arms
Badass Canadian
berserker rage
“weapon X” history

That Len Wein gave Wolverine his badass canadian trait cannot be disputed. We saw it in that single panel debut of Weapon X at the end of Hulk 180. He wasn’t nerdy peter parker or stoic Hal Jordan. Weapon X was a cocky brawler. Wein set the tone for character right at the start.

The Look
It’s true, Wein created Wolverine as generic costumed agent with no discernible powers, just gloves with knives that popped out of ‘em. Wein was even surprised when he saw Logan without the costume as realized by Dave Cockrum and Chris Claremont. They made him into a rugged, hairy man who appeared to be in his late thirties. Wein had seen him as a clean cut man in his 20s. (generic superhero type). It desn’t matter: Wein created the character as a rugged super agent weapon X from the Canadian Mountains who talks a lot of shit. This dictates his look: a world weary, leather skinned man in his 30s. In other words, the ‘look’ of Logan without his costume– as designed by Dave Cockrum– sprung from the unique character that was designed in Hulk 181….That’s Wein’s creation.

Mutant
Claremont had to make Logan a mutant if he was gonna be in the X-Men. He had nowhere to go when giving him a ‘mutant power’ but the path Len Wein had already laid out for him Hulk 181:The senses and smell of a wolverine…Also the berserker/animalistic side. Healing factor is addressed in the next paragraph.

The adamantium-laced bones and healing factor
Being hit in the head by the Hulk in 181 meant Logan was more than flesh and bones. He’d have to have a steel skull and major healing abilites in order to survive that. This was addressed in the Peter David penned 1987 rematch between Hulk and Wolverine. (his brain should’ve been mush, though, but..that healing factor is something ain’t it?) Again, all this backstory created by Len Wein.

The claws are a part of him, not gloves with claws in them. Since he’s a mutant with a healing factor and inherent wolverine characteristics, it was a logical and a natural progression to make the claws a part of Logan.Either way, it started with Wein. Without Wein, there’d be no claws. There’d be no Wolverine.

Berserker/pro killer personality
Think about Wolverine in Hulk 181. This fool comes in to break up a fight…Between the Wendigo and The Hulk. Let that sink in for a minute. You gotta be stupid or crazy to butt in to the middle of that. This is the seed of Wolverine’s personality..right there. Captain America would never act like that. Neither would Spidey. That’s a Logan Trait. And no other character had that trait at the time. (Except maybe Frank Castle.)This trait establishes the potential for Logan’s Beserker rage and confidence in his abilites to kill. This also establishes that he is one unstable guy.

Weapon X history
Look at the way Canadian government treated Weapon X in Hulk 181. They sent in this runt of a man to kill The indestructible Hulk and Wendigo. They could’ve sent in planes and an army to bomb the two monsters…or let them kill each other. They were obviously testing Logan to be the ultimate weapon. This sets up ALL of the Weapon X storylines, his relation with the scientists and agencies behind the weapon X program and the mystery of Logan’s past, which Marvel got a lot of mileage out of….And are still cashing in on…

Len Wein created TWO major marvel franchises in one…Wolverine AND Weapon X!

Hulk #181 establishes EVERYTHING that other writers did to make Wolverine the character he is today. Marvel, pay Len Wein his due!

ESSAY: Is The Watcher a Hypocrite?

The Watchers, believing that their knowledge belongs to the universe, came to the planet Prosilicus, interfering in the evolutionary and technological development of a younger species. Due to the well-intentioned actions of the Watchers, the species self-destructed in nuclear warfare. Horrified at what had happened, the Watchers swore a vow of non-interference in the universe.
-The Watcher, Wikipedia entry

“Uatu has been known to break his vow of non-interference from time to time”
-Reed Richards

What’s up with Uatu, The Watcher? This guy is supposed to be a casual observer of the Marvel Universe. He has vowed never to get involved in what goes on there, for fear of screwing things up. So that means he’s always showing up when superheroes are in danger, and saying, “Hey don’t ask me for anything. I’m just here to observe, and record history.”

Yet, look at page 40, panels 2-4, in Civil War #1, when The Watcher appears before a roomful of superheroes debating the soon to be passed Superhero Restristration Act.

Before The Watcher showed up, people were a little on edge, but figured they’d put their heads together and everything would be okay, one way or another. Then, that reject from “The Coneheads” shows up. Now the heroes know for sure this will be a life-shattering event for many of them. And that pushes already jittery people over the edge.

Now that the superheroes know that a lot of them will probably die in the next few weeks, you can bet some their outlooks changed from “This is a troubled time, but we’ll get through this” to “You want a piece of me? Huh? I got 20 megatons of phaser power in these hands! (Zap!) Take that! (Zap!) And that!”

The Watcher won’t tell anyone any specifics of why this time is so profound that he needs to make himself seen…Because he doesn’t wanna get involved.

That’s equivalent of your spouse behaving as if they’re very angry at you, slamming dishes and stomping around the house, then telling you nothing’s wrong, but you know something’s wrong because they keep glaring at you while sharpening knives. That attitude affects the environment.

That panel in Civil War #1 was the Watcher saying “Everything’s about to get really f—ed up…but go about your business as usual.” And knowing this, you think the superheroes wouldn’t act out of hand, or act prematurely? The Watcher just affected the outcome of Civil War. Big headed bastard.
Found in the quarter bin:
Action Comics #830 Writer: Gail Simone Pencils: John Byrne
Blood of the Demon #14&15 (DC) Story and Pencils: John Byrne
John Byrne is Jack Kirby (And while I’m at it, Todd McFarlane is Berni Wrightson) Good and simple pulp. Like a comic should be. Ahhh, satisfysing. 3 Stars all around.

Savage She Hulk # 5 (Marvel)
This is one of the comics I’ve always regretted passing on in the 80s, along with the first Ms. Marvel series. I finally found it after years of regret. Lame villian, stupid plot. Painfully executed situations. With side characters and sub plots as bad as Ally McBeal, but more ridiculous. Nowhere near as campy fun as the Black Goliath versus Stilt Man comic. Oh, and I found the old Ms. Marvel series, too…Behind the counter…On the wall…Priced 8 to 10 dollars each. WTF? 2 Stars

Top Ten:The Farthest Precinct
5 issues (now TPB)
(America’s Best Comics)
Any comic that connects the dots of comicdoms’s conscious so well as to have Deadpool, Deathstroke and Deadshot be security for Rexcorp CEO, Rex Ruthor (who looks and talks like Scooby Doo in a suit) is worth reading. 4 Stars

New Comics (spoilers)

Civil War #2
Amazing. I’m still stunned. I couldn’t BELIEVE that Marvel did this. They brought Cloak and Dagger back! And they are on Cap’s side… Even though C&D don’t really have secret identities to protect…But still, I’m glad they’re back. Speaking of Cloak & Dagger, I found this online. It’s Wrong & Racist. She’s wrong. He’s racist.
4.5 Stars

Civil War: Frontline#1
So the cameraman who died while taping the New Warriors’ reality show gets a sendoff with much of the media elite attending(including Robbie Robertson and Ben Urich). I didn’t know that if you were a member of the news media, even a lowly camera guy, that editors and newspaper writers and the rest of your brethern come to send you off, like the police do when an officer is killed in the line of duty. Oh wait… that’s because respectable journalists DON’T attend funerals of cameramen who die filming trashy reality shows.

Speedball is still alive. Drat. But then I read on and noticed his powers are gone, which is very acceptable. Regardless of my feelings about Speedball, I still don’t agree with how SHIELD treated Speedball here. The boy’s friends and teammates are dead. 600 people are dead, due to the actions of one Nitro. He just woke up from a coma, body broken. He doesn’t know what’s going on. And you send the corniest negro in the world to deliver some very badly written dialog at his bedside? (“I hope your aren’t fond of the number four.” What?)

Why is Speedball under arrest? The Stamford Tragedy occured before the registration act was pushed through, and while the New Warriors may have been negligent, I don’t see charges against Speedball sticking, since he had no idea that this disaster could happen.

Also there is a very corny story with a Chinese American man explaining to his daughter about the Chinese American internment camps during WW2. They inexplicably put Spider Man’s image throughout the story. I skimmed through it. Boring. It’s good that Marvel is trying to teach the kids (even though kids don’t read comics)…however, liven it up Marvel. The whole issue gets 3.5 stars

Shadowpact #1.
By Bill Willingham. After reading this, I figured DC discovered a new talent. Then I recently bought a bunch of GL Corps from the 80s and noticed he did a lot of work on that. I never heard of the guy. Oh well. I didn’t read much DC in the 80s (Only Supes, Bats, Suicide Squad and Justice League).

This Shadow Pact reminds me… one of the comics I used to pass up in the quarter bin in the 80s (along with the 20 copies of Human Fly #1) was this one issue of the 70s Ragman. The cover always intrigued me, with Rags standing over a black child, but I never picked it up figuring it was a waste of time. Now I have a craving for the original ‘Ragman’ series. And he looks great in ShadowPact. I hope we learn more about him as the series progresses. This debut issue was a pretty good start and I love the art. 4.1 Stars.

The Quarter Bin

Scar Tissue #1-3(Ronin Studios):
You know what made me mad about this thing? At the end of issue #3, The hero’s brother and his cop ex-girlfriend are about to enter the villian’s lair to rescue the hero, who’s being held captive there. The villian is like Wonder Woman, gone really really bad. She has these demonic like minions and all sorts of super villian technology at her disposal.

Our heroes know this. When they were first told where the villian is hiding, they were told to “come heavy”. The cop’s idea of “coming heavy” is to bring six firearms, all of which she intends to use herself, and when her ex boyfriend asks for a gun, she is relunctant to give him one. She finally relents and gives him a firearm. This is supposed to show the reemergence of trust between the two ex-lovers but it is just stupid and it makes me mad:

“We’re going up against Doctor Doom, storming his castle. He has Doombots and trained security all up in there, and you want a gun?..Hrumph..I guess so.”

Bitch, gimme a gun!

“Oh, and let’s not call for backup, even though I’m a cop and we have more than enough to warrant bringing a SWAT team in here.”

WHAT THE #$^&@? This development makes what were previously competent characters look stupid.

This rant is over. 3 stars, so far.

Powers Annual #1 (Image,2001)
A dissapointment. I still have to read more ‘Powers’ before I judge the series, but this was a letdown and a ripoff for those who bought it at cover price. This is the annual, but it was a very short comic book story in which a washed up hero puts together a desperate scheme to be “A-List” (or at least B list) again. Most of this VERY short story consists of the cops grilling the guy in interrogation, until he breaks.
Then the rest of the ‘comic book’ is court testimony of the same guy’s trial, written in screenplay form. And the trial isn’t interesting at all. 1.5 stars

52 week four

Synopsis
The Question and Rene Montoya fight a big monster… John Henry Irons suffers ‘Hulk Split Personality Syndrome’ … Booster Gold is still a waste of a good comic book panel and The Cult of Superman rip Ralph Dibny off for his wedding ring…In other news: There is no Black Adam this issue because ’52′ has exceeded it’s ‘gore’ limit for May.

Notes and comments:

-John H. Irons has decided to give up the Steel persona and is haunted by hallucinations of his Steel personality. Somebody call Doc Samson! And call him quick! John must be really sick, because as of last week, there WAS NO INDICATION that A) he wanted to stop being Steel and B) he had split personality disorder. I swear, most of the time it seems as if the writers for ’52′ make up this story an hour before deadline with no direction whatsoever.

- The space age laser gun that Monotoya is holding on the bottom right of page 24 is completely a Jack Kirby homage. The 2nd best thing about this issue.

-The most intriguing thing about this issue is the last panel. That’s enough to entice me to buy the next issue, which is all Dan Didio cares about.

The History of the DCU: You know if this was an actual comphrehensive history of the DCU, starting from the DCU in the 1940s to exploring the many earths of the DCU, why they were created by the writers and the reason for the first crisis on infinite earths, the platinum age(my moniker for it; starting in 1986-87) to today then I’d find it useful. But this here is a mish mash of junk with no reason or direction. 2 stars

The Quarter Bin

Harley Quinn #21-23 (DC)
Part of Harley Quinn’s journey to hell and back. Harley’s character makes this a fun romp. Featuring one of my favorites, Etrigan! Hey I got a question..Issue 23 is essentially a Manhunter story. Harley doesn’t show up until the last panel. I love the Manhunter, so i didn’t mind, but have you ever bought a comic and the headliner wasn’t even in it, and did that piss you off? Anyway, I’m searching for more back issues of Harley Quinn. 3 stars

EngineHead #1-6 (DC Comics)
Written by Joe Kelly Art by Todd McCheever
Engine Head is a composite of four DCs (that’s an acronym for D-list Cyborgs) created in a Frankenstein manner by the Mechanic. Even though this is a DC book, this is Engine Head’s universe, (a main character is a pedophile) and the DC regulars that appear are so transformed by Kelly and McCheever that you wouldn’t even recognize them. 4 Stars

Vigilante #13
Marv Wolfman and Gil Kane
This is one of those comics that I used to pass up as a kid (along with V for Vendetta), and always regretted not giving it a try. This is a self contained story, but I don’t learn much about Vigilante here. This is a Double Indemnity – inspired story about a woman, her lover and her dead husband. Did the lovers kill the husband for his money? Vigilante is on the case. Good ‘ol pulp comic fun. 2.5 stars

52 Week Three
On the cover: Lex Luthor. ‘Nuff Said.

Synopsis: Is Lex Luthor dead? Is Black Adam granting amnesty to super villians in his country of Kahndaq? And Natasha and her Uncle Shaquille O’Steel are going at it again.

In other news: More Black Adam! Power Girl! Lex Luthor! Less Booster! YAAAAAAY!

Notes and comments:

-Where ever you see Black Adam in the DCU, you know there is gonna be gore. Let’s just take that as a given.

- Captain Obvious comment: I think with Black Adam the writers have- for the past couple of years- been playing with the concept of what if someone with the power of Wonder Woman, Superman or Shazam were a megalomaniac and as ruthless as the Punisher?

-One of the many great sequences in this issue is the confrontation between Power Girl and Black Adam.

-Racist Stereotype Alert: Skeet warns a gyro street vendor to move out of the way, because, yet again, Booster is going to unneccesarily destroy public and private property… The Mexican vendor can only respond with offering the ROBOT a gyro. Skeet keeps tellin him to move and the guy keeps saying “Gyro?” like that’s all he can say or comprehend in english. And second, he has to be so stupid as to offer food to a robot, like all spanish speaking immigrants can only process information that has to do with their jobs.

-It looks like Mr. Mind may be returning, which is good. Ironically, Captain Marvel- the character that DC once considered a thorn in its side – is providing this series with many characters from his canon: Black Adam, Doc Sivana and Mr. Mind. But no appearance yet from Big Red himself.

Also: History of the DCU part 2…I don’t care.

52 week three: 4 stars

On the cover: Booster Gold– with a look and concept that is a direct ripoff of Captain Amazing from Mystery Men– is surrounded by a Skeet, two butterfaced skanks, nine photographers and one de-powered Clark Kent.

Synopsis:
Nothing of real interest happens in this issue. We find out that -along with Doc Sivana- other Mad Scientists are being kidnapped. Somebody tampers with “the fabric of time”; The Question tampers with Renee Montoya’s head and somebody tampers with Sue Dibny’s headstone.

Notes and Comments:

-Some starstruck kid meets Ralph Dibny in person and compares Elongated Man to Batman. And just in case you don’t get that this guy is a total tool, they make that painfully obvious by having him wear ‘Booster Gear’ , hipster earrings and goatee with no mustache.

-Ralph Dibny finds an ominous message on his wife’s headstone. Someone spray painted an inverted Superman symbol there and now he thinks his wife may be alive. Apparently one man’s vandalism is another man’s clue that his wife has been resurrected from the dead…

-Booster prevents a passenger plane from crashing to the ground. Booster and Skeets keep referring to the plane as Flight 2824. After they save the plane, a newspaper pops up with the headline “Hundreds dead on Flight 2428″. Is this a newspaper of what would’ve been printed had Booster not been there (if so this is a typo and why would they show a newspaper that doesn’t exist?) or… did a flight 2428 really crash? Confusing. Bad storytelling here.

-Renee Montoya is a tough hardened cop who is an alcoholic, and she acts like all the cliche male alcoholic cops in detective stories: she’s a womanizer. I scoffed at that until it provided the only exciting moment in the book, Montoya lying in her female lover’s arms, which makes me think of real woman on woman action. As a matter of fact, you’d be better off if you skipped buying this issue and just rent a hot lesbian porno.

ALSO: The History of the DCU part 1. Totally uninteresting and of no consequence to any story. If you aren’t a DCUphile you won’t understand most of what they are talking about, and if you are a DC buff, it’s boring.

2 stars, overall

The first issue seems to be just as I feared; lacking superstars like Martian Manhunter and Green Lantern
(they have cameos) and full of D-Listers who can’t sustain their own title, like Booster Gold and Steel.

Synopsis with spoilers galore:

In the aftermath of Crisis, the SuperHeroes ™ mount massive rescue and cleanup operations. We follow the Steel rescue efforts SPANNING THE GLOBE. Take note of this because he punishes his niece later for wanting to do the same thing.

Officer Renee Montoya (from Gotham PD) struggles with her demons, Ralph Dibny struggles with the loss of his wife and Booster Gold is a self serving prick. Also, Black Adam declares a worldwide war on injustice, and Booster discovers that the history of the DCU (as he knows it) is in danger. 3 stars out of five.

Notes and Highlights:

1) Booster has sponsor logos all over his spandex outfit. His threads (especially on week 2′s cover) looks a hell of a lot like Greg Kinnear’s Captain Amazing character from the movie Mystery Men. I know Booster came first, but he never looked like a NASCAR driver before.

2) On page 8, after Booster unnecessarily endangers civilians and causes thousands of dollars in property damage by slamming an already two ton baddie in RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF A BUSY STREET. Immediately afterward we meet a bastard child worse than The Omen’s Damien:

You see, this little girl is upset because her brother told her that Wonder Woman is dead . When Booster consoles the girl that Wonder Woman is fine, they’re all fine”, The boy goes from grinning to putting his head down and being genuinely sad and hurt by the fact that that Wonder Woman isn’t lying on a distant planet, broken and bludgeoned to death like Earth 2 Superman. This is why some people hate kids.

3) Shaquille O’Steel confronts his equally iron suited niece when she decides to high tail outta town. It goes something like this:

Steel: “Young lady, you’re gonna clean up this mess in Metropolis and you’re gonna do it now!”

Natasha: “Awww, but Unca John, I wanna go hang out with the Teen Titans!”

Steel’s argument is that ‘Tasha has a duty to clean up debris in their city. But earlier in the issue, it is stated that ‘Teen Titans’ are digging out the East Coast. So, if ‘Tasha joins TT she’s just going to help clean debris and people in another city, instead of her own. She’ll still be saving people, so what’s the big deal? Shut up Steel.

Natasha sees through Steel’s bull, because she does the rebellious teen thing and tries to high tail it out of there, but Steel pulls out a remote control that looks funkier than the one Captain Kirk died for in ST:Generations. He presses the button and her suit locks up, then pops off (much like Iron Man’s does on the cover of New Avengers #18.)

“You want armor?” He says, leaving her to pick up the pieces. “Build it yourself”

Black folks love to humiliate their kids.

4) A blast from the past: We’re in some sort of lab when we see two old Captain Marvel Villians: Doctor Sivana and Mr. Mind. When I was a kid I had a ‘Shazam’ 45 Vinyl. (You know those records where they read a story featuring your favorite superheroes like Bionic Man, Spider Man and Batman? ) Doc Sivana and Mr. Mind were on the cover and the story featured a Shazam adventure with those two as the foils. I loved it as a kid. Good times….

Anyway, back to 52…Mad Scientist Doctor Sivana’s lab is breached and he is abducted by two unknown goons (looks like Killer Croc and Gorilla Grodd to me)

5) Booster Gold discovers that history is not going as it should and freaks out in front of several superheroes. They TRY to subdue him. My questions for this scene are:

A) Why does it take Martian Manhunter AND Green Lantern to hold Booster down? Just one of those guys should be able to subdue Booster with minimal effort, and

B) If someone like Booster, who I assume everyone knows is from the future, freaks out and acts strange, saying “this wasn’t supposed to happen”, shouldn’t the other heroes take him seriously and treat the situation with concern?

6) In the final scene of the issue, The Question peels the bat symbol off of the bat signal and spray paints a “?” on the spotlight, then points it right into the window of the troubled Officer Renee Montoya. Joseph Campbell calls this the warrior’s call or something. Yawn.

All I know is–The Question just better clean up that mess he made on the Bat Signal before week 52– if he knows what’s good for him.

See you in week 2 thru 4!!

The 25 cents bin

Fury of Firestorm #13 and #40. I read #40 in which the younger firestorm graduates from high school and I enjoyed it very much. Nostalgic fun. Can’t wait to read #13.
#40 gets 3.5 stars out of 5

Engine Head #2-6 I haven’t read it yet. But the art is very…weird and offbeat. It looks different. I picked these up because of that and because one cover features a skeleton who wears a suit and smokes a cigar. Since this is a DC title, I think that character is Mr. Bones, who made appearances in JSA.

Superman 1995 Annual: Year One. David Micheline wrote this, which sold it for me. It’s about Clark’s first sojourn into space as Superman. Intergalactic adventure stuff. Supes finds a dying alien who comes to earth to seek a warrior to help defend his people against a warlike armada. My question to the alien is: ever heard of the GL, Sparky? I’m sure there’s a chapter in your quadrant.

Ms. Tree Quarterly #7 (Spring ’92) Haven’t read it yet. looks like some good noir stuff.

Evil Ernie in Santa Fe #2-4. I just saw this on the shelf at cover price a couple of months ago. Looked real good then. Other horror/gore comics on my personal ‘want’ list are the Friday the 13th and Jason X versus Jason books and The Walking Dead trades.

The Demon #10(DC) I picked it up because it looked like some old school Kirby type stuff …Turns out it was written and illustrated by ilustrated by the Kirbster himself.

Suicide Squad 8-12 and 48-51 This is the one that I will kick myself over. They put what looks like almost the whole run of SS in the quarter bin, but I only picked these few. I just quit my job, so I put a rein on myself. But I will probably kick myself for not getting them all. I didn’t get issues 1-7 and a few others because I know I have them on the east coast and/or I’ve read them already.

Deadshot miniseries 1-4 (1988) I liked him in the Suicide Squad as a kid. Lately, it seems he has a following, the way he is portrayed in the JLU episode. I don’t know much more about him.

Green Lantern Corps Quarterly 7, 8…I wanted every GL book they had too, but I just bought the ones with great covers and left the issues that feature G’Nort the GL alone. G’Nort annoys me.

Tales of GL Corp 220, 221, Annual #2

Wizard March 2006 (50 cents) In this Wizard, they claim that Super Girl is stronger than Power Girl. I was under the impression that Kara/Power Girl is from Earth 2, which I thought makes her almost as powerful as Superboy Prime and Superman from Earth 2. Wouldn’t that make her more powerful than Superman or Supergirl from this New Earth/post-crisis DC?

Animal Man #30- Weird stuff, with Animal Man and Nowhere man going up against a bunch of kids with unusual super powers. I loved it. 3 stars

Avengers Casebook 1999. A summary of all the ’99 Avengers stories,(I think that is after Heroes Reborn?) including Live Kree or Die X-overs. Even though it is not the comic stories, I enjoyed reading recaps and facts about these stories.

Other comics:

Black Goliath 2 and 3…I was reading this and halfway through and noticed the writer tried to give this brother character by making him an amateur and a lettin’ him get his ass waxed by no named villians before coming back to kick some butt. I noticed that the look and attitude of this book is very 70s. Halfway through I wondered if the writer was white and if he ever did anything after this book. I decided to finally flip back look at the writer credits…Chris Claremont. 3 stars

52 Weeks #1 and #2

Marvel Must Haves: Wolverine 20-22. I paid a dollar for this back issue. If you ever come to L.A., go to Golden Apple comics near fairfax and Melrose. haven’t read it yet.

Pulse (Secret War #4) I got it for the cool Wolverine cover. I haven’t read it yet, but since I haven’t read Secret War 1 – 3, then I might not enjoy it. Great Cover, though.

Hulk versus Wolverine #2 This series is getting better. It’s like this guy is filling in holes in the story with flashbacks (just like on Lost). Even though I have problems with little details the story, I liked this MUCH better than issue #1. Next issue is the battle. 3 stars

I saw Method man in the store browsing. He was looking at the House of M trade.

New Avenger Annual- (long review) I had this a while back. A lot of people hate the NA, I don’t know why. In the issue in which Spidey confronted Wolverine about MJ and Wolverine sliced him Parker:”He Snikked me!”, I was won over. And this Annual has me sold.

Millar and Bendis are doing great things with Marvel. Especially with the house cleaning. Millar got rid of that damned annoying Speedball and Night Thrasher (remind me to tell you about my dislike of Speedball sometime) and now Bendis gets rid of a character that has always annoyed me: Black Widow. Back in the 80s I looked forward my Marvel Team Up. Who’s Spidey gonna Team Up with this week? Wolverine? Dardevil? When they’d put in some lame-o I’d be pissed. When they wasted a Team Up issue to put BW in there, I thought “Who the heck is the Black Widow?”

The only time I liked the Hulk was when they brought the show back in the late 80s with a series of TV Movies that teamed him up with other super heroes…Daredevil! Yeah!…Thor! Yeah!…Then in the last Bixby Hulk movie they go out with…Black Widow!? Not only did they waste a good team up that could’ve featured Spidey , Iron Man or the She-Hulk, but to add to my hatred of the Black Widow, the TV Hulk gets killed over her. I was pissed and the ending was a freakin’ bummer. (The Hulk doesn’t die from falling out of a friggin’ helicopter!)

Bendis makes the Widow useful by turning her into the new super adaptoid and engaging the Avengers in a kick ass battle. You see Tony Stark’s a a–hole side (also seen in New Avengers:Illuminati*) and you also see why he is the one and ONLY Iron Man halfway through when the super adaptoid faces the armada of Iron Men.

I’m also digging Spider Woman…So sexy, so misunderstood. I need a girlfriend.

The only thing I have a problem with is Luke Cage, a supposed street tough, getting all gooey over a woman who doesn’t seem to appreciate him or their mixed race child. I mean, your friggin’ Luke Cage man! You’re supposed to be a player, not the playee. 5 stars